Listening

Someone mentioned this morning that many parents use baby sign language with their young toddlers before they can talk. We did. Lil Miss was using signs for more, please, thank you, yes, no and a few others before she started talking. She still uses the signs for please and thank you, although we tell her to use her words also now.

I made the comment that when you are a parent or work with young children, it is very obvious that young children, from the time they are infants well into their early school years understand the world around them more than their vocabulary reflects.

The following verse came to mind:

"At that time the disciples came up and asked Jesus, Who then is [really] the greatest in the kingdom of heaven? And He called a little child to Himself and put him in the midst of them, And said, Truly I say to you, unless you repent (change, turn about) and become like little children [trusting, lowly, loving, forgiving], you can never enter the kingdom of heaven [at all]. Whoever will humble himself therefore and become like this little child [trusting, lowly, loving, forgiving] is greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever receives and accepts and welcomes one little child like this for My sake and in My name receives and accepts and welcomes Me."
Matthew 18:1-5

I started thinking about how children learn to speak...

They learn by listening...

And watching...

Children, by nature, are curious, teachable, and humble. Children are born with a simple faith and trust in their caregivers.

Jesus' words and actions show how much he values children. "unless [I] become as a little child" I will not enter the kingdom of God.

I started thinking this morning that one aspect of becoming like a child that I take for granted is listening. Just as my daughter learns from listening and watching the world around her, I learn more about the nature and character of God by listening to Him. Really listening to Him and His word.

And just as my daughter doesn't always have the words to tell us what she needs, wants, or feels, there are times that I don't have the words to express my needs, wants, or feelings to my Heavenly Daddy. Countless times, I have started praying or worshiping my God only to be at a loss for words of His goodness, His mercy, His love, His (fill in the blank). Or times when my problems and the mess in my world seems to be beyond my words to describe to Him.

I have found myself often thinking "Wouldn't it be great if I could read her mind." when my little girl and I are both frustrated that I don't understand what she is asking for.

Thankfully, our Heavenly Father knows our hearts. Even when we don't have the words to express our thoughts, needs, or feelings...he knows our hearts and our needs. All we need to do is come to Him as a child: listen and trust with simple faith.

Rose Colored Glasses

The old me... a mere three years ago

I have made the comment many times that when I look in the mirror or in pictures, I know that I do not see the same person that others see.  Maybe many has this problem.  We see our problem areas or insecurities more readily.  We judge ourselves harder then others... sometimes.  It is getting better.  I can honestly say that 90% of the time when I look in the mirror now, I like what I see.  Do I see exactly what others see, maybe not... but at least I like what I see.  I never wore make-up, learned to do my hair, or took the time to learn how to really dress stylishly because as a teen and young adult, I felt like people thought I was trying to make up for being large with make-up and clothes... and I thought it was a waste of time since no one liked how I looked anyway.  When I did get "fancied" up and no one noticed, in my head it confirmed my suspicions.  How twisted it that...yeesh.

Thank God for a renewed mind!  (Although I still don't really know how to do my hair and make-up haha)

Even now, when I look at my clothes, I have a skewed view of them.  I wear size small top and size 4 or 6 jeans, and yet when I hold them up to put them on, I still see a size 12 or 14.  I was up to a size 22 at my largest, so seeing myself as a size 12 is coming a long way.   When I go shopping, I still gravitate toward larger sizes because they "look right."  A matter of old habits dying hard... probably. 

Pictures are issue too.  Since I was a teenager, I HATED having my picture taken.  Love to take pictures... hate to be in them.  The reason then, I did not like myself or the way I looked.  Major self-esteem issues, but that's for another blog.  When I look at old pictures now, I think "who in the heck is that person with my face?"  When I look at new pictures of me, I think "who in the heck is that person with my face?"  I am caught in this weird middle ground where I don't really recognize either the old physical me or the new physical me.  I realized in the last few days as I have been organizing and uploading pictures that I have very few pictures of me...from the last 5 years that I have had a digital camera and I am sure if I look back at my prints from before my digital age, their would be few of me there as well. 

the new me...Thanksgiving 2010

In the book of 1st Samuel, when the Lord sends Samuel to find his new King to replace King Saul, He tells he "Samuel, Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."  I know that I am a precious child of God.  I know that He created me and that He loves.  I know that what people think about my body and my appearance should not matter (expect maybe my husband because I want him to be proud of me and take pleasure in my appearance ;) ) But we are stewards of our earthy bodies and must take care of them.  God loved me when I was 270 pounds just as much as He loves me now...UNCONDITIONALLY.  But I feel better about myself now.  I just have some mental baggage when it comes to actually seeing myself.  ;)

My goal: to get more pictures of me.  :) 


Thank God for a renewed mind! 

Adopting Children

Tonight, my thoughts and prayers are with all the parents who have adopted children and teens. I am specifically talking about parents who chose to take into their family a child who has known another family, who had/has a mother and a father that they loved, whether it was a healthy environment or not. A child who may have sisters and brothers they have already grown up with and held onto for support in the midst of chaos. A child who, for various reasons, have been removed from or lost their family due to circumstances out of their control.

To love unconditionally a child you have since infancy, even if they are not biologically yours is one thing.

But...

To love unconditionally a child who comes to you with a past. With more history and baggage than any adult should have, let alone a 6 year old, a 12 year old, or a 16 should have.

To bring a child into your family, knowing one day they may turn there back and resent you.

To hold and comfort and support a child whose world has just fallen apart and help them put it back together.

To not know what unseen scars your child may have or how deep they may run.

To all of you, these words of Christ are especially true: "Whatever you do unto the least of these, you do unto me."

I don't know if I could do it.

God bless and keep you.

Statistical Soapbox

OKLAHOMA CITY (January 25, 2011) -- New results from the 2009 National Assessment of Educational Progress (NAEP) released today show most Oklahoma students are not proficient in science. Seventy-two percent of Oklahoma fourth-graders taking the test and 75 percent of eighth-graders taking the test fell below “proficient” - meaning they scored at “basic” or “below basic.”
State Superintendent of Public Instruction Janet Barresi said the scores come just as Oklahoma students are entering a new testing period for NAEP, beginning this week and running until March 4. Barresi urged the more than 300 Oklahoma schools selected for NAEP testing to ensure that teachers and parents understand the critical importance of the exams.
The science assessment is administered to a sample of students from each state by the National Center for Education Statistics (NCES), which is an arm of the U.S. Department of Education. NAEP measures students‟ knowledge and abilities in the areas of physical science, life science, and Earth and space sciences. Only 28 percent of Oklahoma fourth-graders scored at “proficient” or “advanced,” while only 24 percent of eighth-graders scored at the same levels. In each case, Oklahoma scored four percentage points below the national average."

Okay...just a few point to ponder tonight about this article because it really irritates me. 

The test is not designed to be used as a gauge for states to use. That is not the purpose of this assessment. That is why it is only given to a sample of students. It is not based on a curriculum. It is not a test you prepare kids for or teach towards. It was originally designed to identify the top 20% of students.  I think the fact that we were so close to the national average is a positive thing, not something to be ignored or down played to use to support ones agenda.  And if a person in a political office is going to use such data, I would appreciate a little bit more back ground knowledge.  Don't let it become a scare tactic and use it for the shock value.






Oh...and maybe define the terms.  It might be important to know that "basic" means that they have a fairly good understanding, but are not in the upper 25%.  "Basic" doesn't mean "failed."  Again, once you understand the purpose and goals of the test, you have a better understanding of the terminology. 

In fact - the 4th grade test in any given subject can pull content from the listed science topics at anywhere from a 1st grade to 8th grade level. The 8th grade test pulls from 4th grade through 12th grade material.  It is the same for all the content areas. 

SO...imagine your 4th grader shows up at school one day. Her district has been "randomly" chosen out of those in her state, her school has been "randomly" chosen out of those in her district, and then she has been "randomly" chosen out of her peers to take a test. She is ushered out of her class, with probably little to no notice and put in a room with other randomly selected students and given a test in a format and with content she may never have seen.

If I have a state mandated, district supported curriculum that may or may not match up to the NAEP framework (the vague outline for all that could possibly be on the test)...which do I teach?  If the NAEP test gives open ended, free response questions and all we give in our state is multiple choice, what will our students be comfortable with?

My irritation is not the test itself but when politicians and states use the statistics to bolster their own agenda with little to no regard for the meaning. We, as a consuming public in general, are not very well informed sometimes and politicians (ON both sides) use this to their advantage. It really bothers me.

Do our public schools need a face lift?  Absolutly!!  

Do we need national standards and national assessments?  Absolutely.  


Do we need to increase the rigor and quality of those standards?  Heck Yes! 


Do we need to hold teachers AND students accountable?  Well of course!

Do we have any clue how to do that effectively?  Apparently not.


Does any body have a magic wand?!?  :)  


:) I am done.  I really do love being a teacher.  I just get irritated sometimes.  

Stolen post...from MrsMorris..but she says what I have feeling so much better!

Last night I had a really good talk with God. It was one of those talks that consisted more of weeping than actual praying. In the midst of the Kleenex and mascara trails on my face, I came to the realization that I have not been living a Proverbs 3:5 life recently. I have not been trusting Him with all of my heart; I have been leaning on my own understanding. I’ve relied on my own feeble smarts. BAD IDEA!

The solution He showed me through my mucus-filled quiet time to lead me to the path of change is a verse that keeps coming up in life: “Be still and know that I am God.” Psalm 46:10

I have to stop everything I’m doing if I want to hear from Him. This seems elemental, but it’s becoming increasingly difficult. Stop doing the laundry. Stop watching whatever is on TV. Stop playing Words With Friends. Yes, God is more important!

I used to be so good at this habit, but I have grown out of it. Now my goal is to grow back into the habit of being still, and knowing that He is God – knowing that I can do nothing about my current circumstances, but He is All Powerful and All-Sufficient. So my #1 goal for 2011 is to have at least one “date night” with God every week. This is an extension from my daily quiet time. This is an extended period of time to enjoy His company, and to be still.

We are all children...

I am still listening to "Purpose Driven Life...for Commuters."  Short snippets of wisdom from the book.  Yesterday's snippet was short, sweet, and simple.  It was also a topic that I know I take for granted...what it means to be a child of God and to bring Him pleasure as His child. 

It reminded me that our first purpose in life is to bring pleasure to God just as a child brings pleasure to his/her parent.  Since I started on my journey with Christ back in middle school, I have know that I was a "child of God."  I remember I heard someone pray using "Abba Father" and "Daddy God."  Those references made God seem more real, more close, and more approachable and I started using them when I prayed.  Although ABBA was a Swedish Rock band from the 70's, it is also Greek for Father. Praying to my Abba, my Daddy God, my Heavenly Father has always felt right.  It is hard to explain, but when I come to Him in prayer as His child, it seems to bring me closer and makes me feel like He is listening. 

I don't think I truly understood the metaphor of God the Father until I was a parent.  Being a parent has brought me closer in relationship with my Heavenly Father.  I can't speak as a parent who has given birth to my "own child."  Our Lil Miss is going to be adopted into our family, grafted into our family, just as we have been grafted into the family of God.  I love this little girl more than life itself.  I love watching her grow, watching her learn.  Her smile makes me smile, her tears and hurt can bring me to tears.  When she misbehaves and throws a little fit, although frustrated, I truly just want to help her learn to do and be better.  (ask me again when she is 16....and her misbehavior is more than throwing a sippy cup on the floor or throwing a fit when it is time to get dressed....). 

This is the way God sees me.  I am His child.  He takes pleasure in my happiness.  He wants me to be happy, healthy, and whole.  He wants me to use what he has given me for His Glory.  He lets me make my own decisions and wants me to learn from them.  When they are good decisions, He rejoices with me.  When they are bad decisions, He crys with me and wants me to learn.  He is there to help me get back on track. He forgives, forgets, and helps me move forward.  When I am hurt, lonely, sad, or dejected, He holds me and comforts me, just as a Daddy holds and comforts His child...just as I hold and comfort my little one.

How humbling is that! 

I am more than thankful for my mother and my father.  I am blessed that I had them.  And my heart aches for all the children who do not have an earthly mother or father to show them love and acceptance and security.  These children hold a special place in our Heavenly Father's heart.  They are at the heart of Jesus' words "Whatever you do unto the least of these, you do unto me."(Matt 25:40).  But that is a whole other blog entry ;)

Some points to ponder from Purpose Driven Life: 

5 Things that Make God Smile 

1) When I Love Him above all else 

2) When I Trust Him completely, even when I can't see the big picture.

3) When I Obey Him wholeheartedly, obedience unlocks understanding.  Even if I don't know the why or when I can't see the whole picture.  Trust and Obey go hand in hand.

4) When I  Praise Him for who He is and Thank Him for what He does

5) When I Use the talents He has given me.

Verse for the day:  Psalm 147:11 

"the LORD delights in those who fear him, who put their hope in his unfailing love."

Growing up

I had several of those "She is getting so big" moments in the last few days watching Lil Miss. Many of my friends talk about how it sometimes makes them sad seeing their little ones growing up, but I love watching every new discovery, hearing every new phrase, seeing every new dance.

She is growing up and is doing so incredibly well. She understands so much and seems to soak in new words and experiences. Playing the piano the other day she was swaying to her music and popping her shoulders. I also walked in on her giving her baby kisses in her highchair.

Her new thing is throwing Tea Parties. She brings her Tinkerbell tea set out of the closet (where I hid it) and says "Mama party. Sit here with me." and pats the floor next to her. She pulls out all the cups and bowls and pours tea into all the cups like she has tea every day. Yesterday, Daddy told her that his tea was too hot, she says "its ok Daddy, i fix it" and put his tea cup in the oven on her play kitchen. We realized tonight when Daddy put her dinner in the fridge for a few minutes to cool it off, that she was doing the same thing to his tea yesterday, having watched me do that a few times.

We only let her take certain sippy cups to her room, as some leak and others don't. When she is watching a movie (aka Tinkerbell) in her room, she will ask for a drink. Then she holds it and asks "room?" asking permission to take the cup to her room. If we say no, she puts it on her table in the kitchen. If we say yes, she takes it to her room, puts it in the cup holder of her way cool OU recliner, climbs in and relaxes with her drink. (Sometimes she does throw a little fit if I say no, but she actually does pretty well...she throws fits about not getting candy almost all the time.. ;))

This morning, Daddy was still in bed when me and her were getting ready to go (darn him and his flex days...). She climbed up on the bed and said "me stay here." I joked with her teacher when I stopped in to tell them that she would not be coming to school that she already knows how to sweet talk Daddy into staying home from school .

When I got home from work, I heard her giggling inside the door. I opened it and she yells "Surprise!" Then "Mama...sketties, hurry." Since spaghetti is her all time favorite dinner, as well as Daddy's, I knew that we were having it for dinner and she was excited to tell me about it...and to eat it. She ate almost everything on her plate, with her fork, making a minimal mess. And is drinking from a big girl cup at the table!

It makes my heart happy to see her growing and learning. I love it! I take tons of pictures and cherish every moment, but I am thankful everyday that she is growing into a happy and healthy "little" big girl.

Our prayer every night before we go to bed is "I love you Jesus. Thank you for this day. Bless my Mommy and my Daddy. Keep me happy and healthy. In Jesus Name, Amen!" I am thankful that God knows His great plans for her and is already beginning to work them out in her life!